So many ways to describe a life. I decided to write this as a journal. Moments of my life recreated as if I was there today.

I started this blog at a time in my life when I am going through a divorce, just ended another friendship/relationship that was extremely important to me and am making my way on my own for the first time in 15 years, maybe for the first time ever really. I’ve loved and have been loved but it never seemed to happen at the same time with the same person. I’m beginning to think I’ve had my share of love and that’s all over for me. Am I jaded? Maybe so.

Writing about my life and loves is a way for me to make some sense of it, record it for posterity and basically to get it out of my head!

Leave a comment, ask a question, share a story of your own.

Notes on how to read me…

My blog is meant to be read in the order written. It builds on itself like a book. If you’ve been reading me and want just my most recent post, it’ll always be on my home page. Check the sidebar link Recent Posts for easy access to the last few. The Chapters page lists them all in order posted. The Chronology page is listed by date. Click the Music page for links to all the music videos on my blog.

If you’re new here, I’m not going to tell this story chronologically but rather how it occurs in my consciousness, an emotional mass of experience. Pay close attention to the dates of my entries as they will skip through time as my mind does.

For the most part the men in the stories will have no names. There are a few exceptions. My goal is to show how all of these men essentially are the same man that has broken my heart over and over again. Each man is every man. You’ll be able to distinguish them by dates and context, if you wish, but reading it as a serious of events in one life does not require a clear distinction.

Even though I skip through time, each post adds new information and new connections past to present. You can always read them in any order you choose but I feel they work best in the order written.

If you’re new to my blog, here is the first post to get you started. There a link at the bottom of each post [turn the page ~~>] taking you to the next. The Chapters and Chronology pages list them all and you can click to whichever one you choose.

[Note added March 22, 2008: Lately I have gotten caught up in recent events and haven't skipped back in time as much as I used to. I'll fill in the blanks at some point. I think that blogging about the past has helped me leave it there...and that's a good thing. I've also begun to use names for the men in my stories. Since they are part of my present, this makes them more real and easier to refer to. Videos weren't a big part of the blog in the beginning but have become an important part of every post lately. I think the music adds something to the emotion of the moment. I've recently updated my video links so no more dead links hopefully.]

Chapter One – Endings and Beginnings

September 26, 2007 - Somewhere near the end…

Welcome to my blog,

Just me…Marissa